Awakening Part II

Okay today is the day for the good stuff. Though this was a tough time and experience to go through initially, in the end it was the most awesome spiritual growth spurt I have ever went through. I am very grateful to have had the chance to go through it. I didn't let the seizures define me. I didn't go around announcing it to the world. It just was something my human shell was experiencing.. or so I thought!

After many rounds of different meds and the endless doctors visits to so called specialist I started to come out of my initial state of  rewiring/awakening. The first two years I was not there in my body. Even my husband noticed that I would stare blankly for long periods of time without blinking.. all the while my body looked like it was repeatedly being shocked over and over again. Bless this dear sweet soul who chose to walk beside me during this. He is truly a gift this dear husband and best friend. He really deserves a medal in my eyes.

At about the the third year I became lucid and in my body once again. Seizure activity was still taking place. The electric strikes in my brain were not as intense but other things stared to increase. And when I mean increase it is that they were manifesting prior to this but not as frequent or strong. To make it easy I will list them with an explanation.

1. Snakes! I had to just list that one first. I work with totem animals and for some reason I started to have dreams of snakes. They would bite me and I would actually let them. You may find entries in this blog about these incidences. They would appear everywhere. I would be feeding all my critter outside and they would be everywhere. They never once tried to bite me. Even when I almost stepped on them So what was up with the snakes. Snakes by western religions have always been associated with evil and the devil I dismissed that a long time ago. In other cultures the snake is a powerful healing totem. See where I am going? When they bite you , it is said they are administering ancient wisdom into you. Forgotten knowledge. Along with dreaming and the snakes appearing everywhere in my waking world.. I had the feeling of  a snake crawling up my spine! AUGH!! True fact. I would be sitting down watching television or even doing chores and it would start... at the bast of my spine it felt as if a snake was crawling the length of my spine. I'd kind of go into a wiggle dance.. anything to make it stop. Then the oversexed feelings came on. I was horny constantly. I didn't act out but my husband asked what the hell was I taking? I had to dig deep. What is this? It was Kundalini Awakening. You may look it up but it basically means the awakening of the serpent and or inner knowledge and spiritual wisdom. I guess my time had come. I had no teachers or guides to tell me this. I had to figure this one out on my own. I had all the symptoms. The waking of the Kundalini. I never in a million years would ever think such a thing would happen to me. But it did. So far.. I have broken every rule, every traditional way of thinking when it comes to spirituality. Which is why I am telling my tale to teach others that may be following a similar path. It's a lonely one. It is for sure challenging. But this needs to be said.. if you have chosen this path... you my dear soul are a very very strong soul. You are a very ancient and wise soul and do not let the paths of others drown your own beautiful awakening. On to more cool stuff!
2. Electromagnetic Madness: This is the real interesting one. The first thing people try to do is attach a scientific explanation to this phenomena. I have met very few people that experience this to the lengths and severity that I do.  This is one that most people back away from me. Either they think I'm an outright liar or just freaking crazy. I'm neither and I have witnesses. I suppose I could always do this but I blamed it on ghost or power surges. Here's what happens. It seems I have this incredibly strange electromagnetic field. I haven't been able to wear a watch since 1997. I can but they never make it past a week. When I get very angry, agitated and there is a build up of energy I will cause clocks to stop, lights to blow out whether I touch them or not, I destroy computers, I fry electrical systems. There was a particular time where my dear sweet husband caught on. We were driving down a street in Vegas. We were on our way home from the gym and with my job and goodness knows what else I was agitated as hell and as we drove... every single streetlight blew out. I play havoc with phones. If I get excited in either a good or bad way.. all you can hear is a loud noisy electronic hum. This electronic stuff is an everyday occurrence. It actually has been with me all my life. As a child it was not as strong as I did not have the pressures and responsibilities as I do as an adult. And I found out that by being near nature or having the ability to go into nature for long periods of time I can rid my excess energy. But when I can't.... there is electrical chaos! I suspect this coincides with my gift of empathy. I take in and transmute all energy to heal. Just now starting to "remember"  this is one of many jobs I have to do. The last big episode I had was just last month. I was in the hospital with chest pain. I was having many tests to make sure I had not had any heart damage. I now know what happened. Overload. I was at a job that I was forced to take that was against my path and my body rebelled. Working in the retail food industry over the holidays is beyond toxic to me. Anyway, I was down to my last test on the second day. I already had a headache from not eating. Then they loaded me up with a couple shots of contrast dye to read the images on the MRI. I sat for an hour getting more and more ill. My time came up to get in the machine and guess what I did to that giant MRI. I was so upset and so sick that I totally knocked it offline. The tech kept saying over and over that she never had that happen. She had no idea what to do. She had turned it on and left initially but as soon as she left I think I being very sick and upset.. I shut it down. She had to reboot the whole system. There were other techs to run down, codes to find... and though I was sick as a dog I had to chuckle. I could go on but you get the idea. This still goes one. It's a part of me. I have had to very talented psychics tell me that I am operating at a very powerful frequency. It could be why people are either attracted to me or they shun me. I do see this. I can be an aisle all by myself and in less then 30 seconds I will be surrounded.. or.. I make people feel at unease. I admit. I'm different. I'm not even going to lie anymore. I'm a freak and I'm just trying to figure it all out. More cool stuff... read on!

3. Animals Love Me!! This is not just a part of this particular  time period but all my life I have loved animals. I love all creation. I have no fear of any creature. I pick up snakes. I have no issues with worms. Every photo of me as a young child I was surrounded by stray cats or dogs. Whenever I would go for my long walks as a young child I would sit and watch birds fly over me and I would stare at fish in the creek for long periods of time and they were never afraid of me. During my awakening period this affinity for animals went to another level. I was feeding wild birds and just going about my business when I realized one morning that there were birds everywhere! In all my trees were various birds waiting for me. They followed me as I walked. There were blackbirds, crows, woodpeckers, cardinals, wrens. I woke up one morning and had an owl sitting on my mailbox! I rescued a red tail hawk on my back porch. He was caught in between chairs and I grabbed a heavy tail and began to talk to it. My husband watched in awe as I calmed this terrified majestic bird down to gently carry it out and set it free. I had raccoons follow me. They would eat along side the cats. They got along well. Every now and then the raccoons would get territorial with each other and I would scold them. They would stop and behave once more. I attracted lady bugs. When outside they would swarm to me and I would laugh. I had butterflies land in my hand and sit while meditating. One morning a yellow monarch chose to sit in the palm of my hand and I took it in to show my husband. He asked what was wrong with it. Nothing! He knows I love him. That butterfly let me walk around with him for a good ten minutes. I took him back outside and off he went. Hawks fly over me whenever I run. This has been happening since I was a child. I will rescue turtles from the highway. I have had deer walk up to me. I have called in and talked to a pack of wolves. This is one of  the beautiful gifts that I cherish. It is also the reason why I cannot kill or eat flesh. I feel that universal connection to all living things. Humans I'm a bit impatient with but I'm getting better. Probably the strangest thing I do is that when I see a wasp or bee in the house. I will capture it and set it free. Same with spiders. Animals seem to sense my frequency better then humans. My theory... most of humanity is still shut down and shut off. Even those who say they are awakened, I still feel they are not. Why? The key is empathy. It is a gift that everyone was born with but it is buried. It is often confused with sympathy. Empathy connects you fully to all lifeforms. It is the true connection of Universal Love. We cannot be fully awakened if empathy is not fully developed.

4. Spontaneous Invisibility: I love this one. This I have my suspicions has been happening to me all my life. Explains why people look over me. When this became apparent was around 2000. I was working as a manager for a health food store. We were slow and my employees went on break so I was there doing inventory and chilling out to some meditative music. I heard the door ring as customers came in. We had a laid back business so I left them browse for a bit. Then they started to walk towards me. I smiled up at them as I was kneeling on the floor to put vitamins on the shelf. I said hello and asked if they needed any help. Now they are standing right in front of me now. They ignore me! What!? I shrug wait a few minutes thinking they are just self absorbed then I decide I better see what they're up to. I walk over to them and they both scream! We didn't know anyone was in here! Where did you come from. I'll mention this again. My store was very small. There is nowhere for me to hide and they walked right up to me. They did not see me. I have had people walk into me,then getting the same bewildered look. I do it to my poor husband when I am in book stores. I'll get really calm and into my zone and he can't find me. I'm not there. I've done this to my co-workers and recently at my last job with a customer. I did a bit of investigation into this. I'm not really going anywhere. It's perception. When I am vibrating at a much higher frequency then the human eye, I will appear not to be there. I had an old man walk right into me at the grocery store a few weeks ago. Scared the living crap out of him. I refer to being in the zone as when I am feeling totally detached from my surroundings. I also seem to do it when I am fully focused on a task. The other day when someone on facebook mentioned I was a young soul just learning.. I thought of all my experiences and just giggled. If he only knew! Still love the sweet soul but get a tickle when they can't yet perceive the messenger.  More cool stuff! Read on!

5. Orbs, sparks and angelic music: During my last three years we have the increase of orbs appearing in all my photos. They are big. They are solid and NO... they are not water drops. This is the first thing the skeptic will say. Okay... then if so.. why do they only appear stationed over my head? Hmmmmmm? I also and continue to know when time is slowing or speeding up. It fluctuates. I have been able to slow time on my own but for no longer then 30 minutes at a time. Seeing and viewing parallel worlds. Contact with loved ones on the other side and specifically during this time I would wake to the very loud sound of angelic music. That's the only way to describe it. This was persistent during my last three years. Now about this time we are heading into the homestretch. I have about two to three years max where I have no memory. It was pure  electrical tuning and refining the light body. I also suspect there was some DNA encoding taking place as I would hear different frequencies. The skeptic would say it was normal ringing in the ears. NOT. Explain then  why it would actually change tones as if someone was using a dial in my brain.

All these things are still occurring, though I do not have seizures anymore, as I suppose they were not what they seemed. I to this day know I was being rewired. Now how  the seizures stopped is quite funny. I woke up one morning. I think it was the summer of 2010 and informed my husband that I was done! Done what?  I am done with the seizures. They're gone. By now my husband has learned that whatever I say.... is not to be questioned. I was off of my anti-seizure meds in a weeks time. Not something to do ever! It usually takes awhile to wean off as these powerful drugs can cause more intense seizures if taken off too fast. As far as I was concerned the drugs were never working anyway as something more wonderful and profound was taking place. I was waking. I was being prepared. I was becoming.

I still experience all of the above. My average day is really not so average. This is my everyday life. Though it may seem unbelievable this is just me. I have bad days. I get frustrated but I know I have a job to do. Awakening happens in layers. I get a tickle when I see the lists on the internet to tell you if you are fully awakened. It happens in spurts, stages and it never happens all at once. These poor human shells couldn't hold all that energy. Look what happened to me for five years!

I'm still learning. I'm not as meek as I once was. I'm awake but now for me it's the remembering part. I listen to sound frequencies, drink lot's of water, I take no pharmaceutical drugs, I do not smoke nor drink I have no taste for violence. I can't get into games such as sports and competing. I may be strange. I may be a missing link. I did contact a few psychics. Most I have come across are shams. Especially tarot card readers. They can't read me and are not gifted enough to do so. There are two that have been consistent. They both have said that I am not a human soul. I'm cool with that. Makes sense. I am operating at a powerful frequency different then humans. I am surrounded by many guardians and guides. Yep. .. spot on there too. Also my aura appears to psychics as blue to violet and purples. I'm one big mystery is what I am. And it's been tough! This has not been a glamorous path so no one needs to envy me. I have been broken. I have even been suicidal at points. It is tough trying to exist in a world that you just go against in every way shape and for. I may even be the next step in human evolution but whatever I am.. I am here to learn and to share and most of all to teach others to love life. Especially how to accept and love those of us sweet brave souls that chose to incarnate into a maddening world that has yet been able to put aside its perception of normal to embrace the Universal Aspect of Every Divine Expression of Love. I am one of many expressions and so are you.

Blessings of eternal love and light,
Tawnya